Mojo The Buck-toothed Vampire

Mojo The Buck-toothed Vampire



Music and Lyrics by Mat Greaves

Down in a cave, in Hungary
Dwelt a creature, depraved and reviled
With murderous intent
And an appetite for blood
He came to Budapest in from the wild
Head to toe in black
With a high-collared cape
Claws lurched from his twisted hands
Yet no one was the least bit frightened
Or intimidated
This he did not understand

(Chorus)
And his skin was cold and pale as the snow
And his eyes burned red like hellfire
He was the one that other Nosferatu
Never claimed to know
He was Mojo, the buck-toothed vampire

This fiend, this creature of darkness
Had a bloodlust that burned from within
But due to his maxillary central incisors
His fangs could never reach his victim’s skin
He never mastered the art of seduction
Of this blood sucker, no damsels were scared
And this ghoul needed no introduction
For when he approached,
Nobody cared!

His brohams would often give him wedgies
Mr. Hyde loved to kick him in his sack
Frankenstein would leave garlic on his coffin lid
And “stake me” signs would always grace his back

And his skin was cold and pale as the snow
And his eyes burned red like hell fire
He was the one that other Nosferatu
Never claimed to know
He was Mojo, the buck-toothed vampire

His capes all stopped at mid-thigh
He wore a beanie instead of a top hat
And he never quite learned how to fly
He turned into a bunny instead of a bat
And it didn’t help his hair was short red and curly
It didn’t help he couldn’t fight for shit
And even when he lurked? He did it kinda girly!
And his nourishment came from mommy’s… (Ahh ahh ahh!!!)

Spooky bridge!

Ohhhhh ohhhh ohhhh ohhhh…

Mojo picked a fight, with a Lycanthrope
When the Wolf-man called him Bucky O’Hare
Mojo said ”I’ll kick your ass!”
But the Wolf-man, he just laughed
He said “Come at me bro! If you dare!”

Mojo’s facial chicklets got knocked out of his skull
When he face-planted on a rock in the mud
Now his fangs can pierce his victim’s jugular
But they all laugh when he says…
“Bleh Bleh! I vant to thuck your blood!”

His skin was cold and pale as the snow
And his eyes burned red like hell fire
He was the one that other Nosferatu
Never claimed to know
He was Mojo…
Oh his skin was cold and pale as the snow
And his eyes burned red like hellfire
He was the one that other Nosferatu
Never claimed to know
He was Mojo, the buck—toothed…

Well, not anymore.

Vampire!

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